Thursday, July 22, 2010

A short post...

It is really surprising to me to see the looks we get from some of the Chinese people when we are out and about with Avery. We don't have her arm covered up, it's too hot for long sleeves. When I look at her I don't see her arm, I see her cute face. When I look at the other children I don't see the cleft lip, or braces for the club feet, I see their faces. Their warm cute faces.

As we were walking today from lunch back to the car on the side of the street we would get looks from a lot of people and the looks were of disgust sometimes. They stared at her arm, never her face, just her arm, and then they would whisper to eachother. I know I don't know what they are saying, but it makes me furious. I know we get looks also because we are Americans with a Chinese baby, but these looks are different than those looks. When I see people like that I kiss her forehead and say to her how much Mommy & Daddy Ilove her. We will take care of her, and she is special. She is not just a child with a special need. She is a child, a child in need of parents who will love her forever and take care of her every need. We are those parents and proud to be. We are fortunate that she has come into our lives, what a special little girl she is, and she makes our world turn!!

Jan has found this also in her province where she is with Sage. It's very upsetting to all of us.

We love our children and that's all that matters!!

~Allison, Gary & Avery

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Yup -- don't worry about the looks at all. Love all the new pictures. Man, there were some serious fish there! You all look perfect together!
Kelly

Unknown said...

So sad and maddening to hear, but I guess that was probably one of the reasons that Avery was given up. The social stigmas are horrible. It's sad to hear people being so mean to such a small little kid, or any kid for that matter. Once you guys come back over here things will hopefully be different. Although there are always those idiots. Don't let the ignorance of others ruin your time... not that you are. The three of you look great together and I have to say, I think Avery looks like Gary somewhat. It's hard to tell because I've only seen pictures but there are some features that seem similar. :)

Christa Bertram said...

It's been great following your journey and remembering ours. By this point of our trip I asked Benji what he wanted to do that day and he said, "I want to get my son and go home." It's so hard to be out of your element when you are trying to bond with a new child.
I am sick about the looks you are getting from the people of China. It's pretty sad. I be once you're home you won't notice those kinds of looks as much at all.
I was at Beth's today and you should have heard the boys telling me about Avery and her blowing kisses to them on Skype. They said she was touching Gary's face and "talking" to them too. Noah seemed so excited about it. He even made her a poster on the computer which I'm sure you'll see when you get home....so cute.
Gary, just wanted to give you a little encouragement about the bonding. Lucas wanted nothing to do with me for 2 to 3 weeks and I was crushed. Now he's the biggest Mama's boy there is. Hang in there. Alli, stay strong. It's so hard to be the only one to carry the baby, change the baby, feed the baby.... I know you love every minute of it, but it's still hard.
I feel like I get on here and ramble, so I'll cut this comment off now. I can't wait to meet your sweet girl. Have a great day!

Anonymous said...

Hurray for poopy diapers! Glad to hear Avery Lin is bonding with Mommy AND Daddy. She is so cute. Pay no attention to those rude strangers who stare, but I see your mama bear protective instinct is at work:)Love yas, Amy and Dana Cowles!

Anonymous said...

Hi Guys! So glad to hear things are going better. Yeah for poop! I think Avery's arm looks great! Amazing how obviously insensitve people can be, isn't it? Hopefully the culture in the US will be more accepting - hopefully. Avery is so lucky to have you both to love and protect her. People used to stare at Jake's lip when he was a baby too. Some would even come right out and ask "what was wrong with his face?" It would make me so angry. I got to the point where I didn't care anymore and I looked at one lady and said "well, at least his can be fixed!" then walked away. Funny thing is, I don't think she got it. :D
~Kristin

Anonymous said...

Keep sticking up for your little girl! We, as parents, are our children's only advocates through life. Continue your pride!! I am very happy to read about all the progress you have all made in the last few days. How exciting! I bet you can't wait to be home and just have a good ole fashioned hamburger or chicken sandwich, huh?! My thoughts and prayers continue to be with you! -Erin Mayne